Sunday, October 26, 2008

Carve yourself a Barack O' Lantern

Boulder County: Full of crazy-ass liberals.

How I love my town, let me count the ways all $1,767,469 of them. That's the total campaign contributions from Boulder County to the Obama campaign. How much did Mr. Magoo get? $166,820. Not bad considering this is home to the craziest bunch of lefties in the known Universe.

"There are very active people that are aware of and concerned about the issues," said Pat Waak, chairwoman of the Colorado Democratic Party. I don't know if that even begins to cover what's been happening in Boulder during this 2008 campaign. Parents clothe their 8 year-olds in Obama t-shirts and buttons, seemingly every yard has an Obama/Biden sign in it, restaurants hold fundraising events for the Obama campaign, Liberals gathered at local bars to watch the Presidential Debates, all the while cheering and jeering at the TVs. The homeless down on Pearl St. have changed their cardboard signs from "Will work for Food" to "Will vote for Obama" Little do they know that the crazy Boulderite who just gave him $20 will drag his sorry ass down to the County Courthouse and do everything in their power to see if that guy can vote. You have to drive to Erie or Longmont to see your first McCain/Palin yard sign, well acutally I did see one in the North-Eastern part of Boulder. Talk about hopeless, this is like being a Yankee fan in the south side of Boston. A bit of relief from Bruce Oreck, a Boulder attorney, "If voter turnout is heavy in Boulder County, it could sway Colorado for Obama, and it seems how Colorado goes could affect how the nation goes. So it's turning out that little old Boulder County could be a pivotal place." That's what I'm talking about you crazy-ass Liberals!

Saturday, October 25, 2008

Say it ain't so John the Quarterback

John the Mudslinger McCain was back campaigning in Colorado on Friday with former Broncos quarterback John Elway. He drew an impressively, massive crowd of 6,000 hate spewing, fear spreading, ignoramuses to Durango High School. On the front page of the Rocky Mountain News today I had the priviledge of reading this:

"I think when the votes come in, Obama will be surprised," said Chris Gregory, an unaffiliated Durango voter who works as a high school janitor. Gregory is supporting Mccain and his running mate Sarah Palin because they are "the true Americans."

Oh brother, where do I begin. When the votes come in, Obama will be surprised. "Oh SNAP! I didn't think we'd actually win Georgia, North Carolina, Virginia and Indiana. AND Ohio AND Florida?! It's as if the natural universe is turning upside down on its head. What in the name of REAL America is going on here?" As for the "true Americans" quote, its already been well documented that Todd Palin, Governor Dipshit's husband, was once part of the Alaskan Successionist Party, for you Republicans that means they were in favor of Alaska splitting from the United States to form their own country of Alaska. News flash to Chris the Janitor, John McBush and Sarah Failin' are not going to help you, at all. They're not going to help lower your taxes, they're not going to help you afford your healthcare, they're not going to help send your kids to college. But I'm sure you'll be able to afford that yourself on your janitor's wages.

Elway cautioned the crowd against counting out the McCain campaign, "I know a thing or two about comebacks," Elway said. Ok, so that's a brilliant line, but Johnny boy, this is not being on the two yard line in Cleveland, in the Dawg Pound, with two minutes left to send your team to the Super Bowl. This is like being in a marathon and you're 3 and half miles behind the Kenyan team and they have the finish line in sight. Now that's a brilliant line.

Tuesday, October 21, 2008

Fake America

Who's patriotic? Well, certainly not me seeing how I already cast my vote for that no good terrorist Barack Obama. Here's a portion of a funny email I received about the "Blue States" succeeding from the Union to start, what Jon Stewart affectionately refers to as, "Fake America."

Dear Red States...

We've decided we're leaving. We intend to form our own country, and we're taking the other Blue States with us.

In case you aren't aware, that includes Hawaii, Oregon, Washington, Minnesota, Wisconsin, Michigan, Illinois and all the Northeast. We believe this split will be beneficial to the nation, and especially to the people of the new country of New California.

To sum up briefly: You get Texas, Oklahoma and all the slave states. We get stem cell research and the best beaches. We get the Statue of Liberty. You get Dollywood. We get Intel and Microsoft. You get WorldCom. We get Harvard. You get Ole' Miss. We get 85 percent of America 's venture capital and entrepreneurs. You get Alabama . We get two-thirds of the tax revenue; you get to make the red states pay their fair share.

With the Blue States in hand, we will have firm control of 80% of the country's fresh water, more than 90% of the pineapple and lettuce, 92% of the nation's fresh fruit, 95% of America's quality wines (you can serve French wines at state dinners) 90% of all cheese, 90% of the high tech industry, most of the U.S. low- sulfur coal, all living redwoods, sequoias and condors, all the Ivy and Seven Sister schools, plus Stanford, Cal Tech and MIT. With the Red States, on the other hand, you will have to cope with 88% of all obese Americans (and their projected health care costs), 92% of all U.S. mosquitoes, nearly 100 percent of the tornadoes, 90 % of the hurricanes, 99% of all Southern Baptists, virtually 100% of all televangelists, Rush Limbaugh, Bob Jones University, Clemson and the University of Georgia. We get Hollywood and Yosemite , thank you. Additionally, 38% of those in the Red states believe Jonah was actually swallowed by a whale, 62% believe life is sacred unless we're discussing the death penalty or gun laws, 44% say that evolution is only a theory, 53% that Saddam was involved in 9/11, and 61% of you crazy b*****ds believe you are people with higher morals then we lefties.

By the way, we're taking the good pot, too. You can have that dirt weed they grow in Mexico.

Peace out,
Blue States

Classic, I love the part about having to foot the bill for the health care costs of 88% of obese Americans. The state I voted in, Colorado, has continued to have the smallest percentage of overweight citizens of any state for the past 30 years. It will be great to see my home state go Blue for only the 3rd time in its history.

Here's a video from the Daily Show about "Fake America"

Monday, April 24, 2006

Steep and Cheap

So www.steepandcheap.com comes through again. I just bought a DAKINE hydration pack for $27. Normally it retails for $85. In this day and age of high priced outdoor equipment, you got to keep your eye out for the deals. So if you haven't bookmarked SteepandCheap.com, you should. Check it everyday, they put a new item up at midnight and once their stock is sold, you're SOL.

Sunday, April 09, 2006

Save the Waves Coalition

I just came across this website and thought it was really interesting. The Save the Waves coalition is an environmental group that sets out to protect some of the world's best surf breaks that are under threat of extinction due to coastal development near the break waters. Through letter-writing and email campaigns to foreign goverments and press, the coalition urges them to preserve good waves and that these waves can be beneficial to the local economy. The website is savethewaves.org check it out.

Thursday, April 06, 2006

Nicklaus Golf Tip

Here's a good shot alignment tip straight from Jack Nicklaus, so you know it can't be too far off, right? At some point in your pre-shot routine, stand directly behind your ball with your eyes in a straight line with your ball and your target. Now, pick out a point about 3 feet in front of your ball on the ground. I usually look at a side of a leaf or the space in between two branches or whatever might be on the ground. When you walk to your ball stay aware of your "point" and its relation to the ball. Then when you address the ball in your normal stance, try to visualize a line coming from the center of your club that goes through the ball, to your "point" 3 feet in front of it and finally all the way to your target some 100+ yards away. With this line from your club all the way to the target, try to line your feet, hips and shoulders perpendicular to your target line so that you send the ball along the path you envisioned after contact. Hit 'em straight.

Sunday, April 02, 2006

Steep and Cheap

There's a website out there that all you outdoor enthusiasts should bookmark. Its called steepandcheap.com and every night at midnight they put up a new product. The company gets surplus outdoor equipment and prices the gear to move. Once they sell all they have of a certain product, you have to wait until midnight for the new product. They have all sorts of stuff at ridiculously cheap prices like gloves, jackets, headlamps, snowboards etc. www.SteepandCheap.com

Saturday, April 01, 2006

REI Garage Sale

Hit up the garage sale at REI in Boulder, CO this morning. They sell as-is items that people have brought back for whatever reason and sell them at garage sale prices. Doors opened at 9 a.m. We rolled into the parking lot and there was already a line about a 100 deep, we managed to get in rather quickly though. I've been looking to pick up a tent and a ThermaRest sleeping pad, but you kinda take what you can at these things. I did pick up some pretty sweet stuff though. A Leatherman for $35, it was a little used but in great shape and sold new for $70. Some ultra-lightweight titanium pots from MSR (Mountain Safety Research) with a dent on the bottom, but I should be able to fix it with a rubber mallet. Got those for $30, they were originally $70. Also bought a longsleve mock zip-up, vapor-wick by North Face for $20. This is good for a base layer or as light cover in warmer temps. Pretty pleased considering I spent about $90 on three things when its easy to spend that on one thing at REI. To get into the REI garage sales you need to be a member. Its real easy, all you got to do is fill out a membership app. and pay the one-time only $15 fee. Then you get any 2 regular priced items %20 off a year and %10 back on all of your purchases for the year. Sometimes they have months where members can get an one item %20 off and doesn't count towards your two allotted items, look out for those. Now its time to plan the next trip...

Friday, March 31, 2006

Havasu Canyon :: Day 2

The next morning after some fruit, a grilled cheese and hard-boiled eggs, we continued north along the creek about 5 miles where the blue waters of Havasu Creek meet the brown force that is the Colorado River. Being along the banks on the Grand Canyon you begin to think just how powerful and unforgiving nature can be and how everything else in life means very little at that moment. Time slowly salts away the earth and all that is in it and at that moment I felt a sense of oneness with my surroundings.
After a brief stay at the Colorado River, we made our way back to our camp at Beaver Falls. We decided to head back to where we had stayed the first night outside of Supai to give ourselves a head start on the trek back to the car the following morning. After making the climb back up Mooney Falls through the miner's tunnel, we refilled our CamelBacks and Nalgenes at a spring and headed towards the village of Supai. As we walked through the village, the sun was setting and local people were returning to their homes for the night. I passed by a small boy and said "what's up little man?" He didn't say anything, just laughed as he grabbed onto my pack to slow me down. The entire day had been quite an experience and I couldn't help but feel guilty as we walked through the land this tribe shared with us, the American travelers whose ancestors had done so much to destory and confine their culture to small nooks and crannies throughout America.
We made camp outside of Supai and laid our packs out underneath the stars in Northern Arizona. Around 4 a.m, I awoke to rain drops smacking me in the face and suddenly the sky that was so full of stars was black and sullen. We hadn't packed in a tent since we were in a place that might get 2 inches of total rainfall all year outside the monsoon seasn in late July. So we decided to put the tarp we were sleeping on over us to prevent being completely soaked. Just before we had left for this trip, I picked up a new sleeping back at REI. Thankfully, the guy at REI told me that to get a synthetic bag instead of one made of down if I was ever going to get wet. I ended up getting the North Face Snowshoe, its rated for 0 F/ -17 C and turned out to be a really good buy at around $200. It stayed warm even though everything in that canyon was soaked at that point and helped me make it through the night.
At first light, we picked up and headed south back to the car at Hualapai Hilltop. Along the way, I saw what I wasn't able to see on the way in at night. The once isolated and remote canyon was now filled with candy bar wrappers and gatorade bottles. How people can come to place like this and leave their trash everywhere is beyond me. We did what we could to pick things up along the way, but the entire route looked more like an alley behind a 7-11 than a giant crack in the desert in Northern Arizona. After about a 3 hour hike, we made it up the steep switchbacks back to the car and dragged our exhausted bodies to Flagstaff for some Fajitas.